I drew three cards to understand just where I’m at right now. There are many things swimming in my head – a hangover from hard times several years ago. I need to sort the wheat from the chaff.
Six of Cups – a sense of nostalgia, harking back to innocent times, idealising the past rather than living fully in the present. There was a time before pain – I have wished often to feel that way again.
Five of Swords – unfair battles, false victory – am I the ‘victor’ or the victim? I’ve played both of these roles in the shakedown after all of that pain. I’ve taken the moral highground when I’ve had no right to do so, and I’ve been, or at least felt, the victim of others cleverly doing so. Wish I could just get outta that whole nasty cycle.
Temperance – needing to bring together conflicting forces to create harmony and balance. Ha! Yep. I wish.
I understand why they are all there…but what are they really telling me? I needed more information. I drew three more…asking – where are those cards leading me?
Six of cups to Five of Pentacles – feeling spiritually bereft, possibly self-pitying, not seeing the ‘salvation’ right before me
Five of Swords to Knight of Wands – rushing at things, firey energy without though. A defence mechanism?
Temperance to Six of Pentacles – charity, a ‘do-gooding’-ness, feeding myself through helping another.
Hmm. I can see some sense emerging here. I’m seeing unhealthy behaviour leading to some less-than-helpful outcomes. One more question to ask. What must I understand or do?
Six of Cups to The Sun – oh my, will I wake up and smell the effing coffee already? Let go of the past. Get out of that victim mentality. The past is the past, and the things I’ve experienced have made me stronger and wiser. Time to bask in the gorgeousness of now.
Five of Swords to Queen of Wands – she is a bringer of positivity, of ‘get over it’ humour and practical solutions. She asks me to laugh at myself, at what all of us did.
Temperance to Six of Wands – woo, okay! The victory card. Maybe this is telling me I’m winning. Maybe it’s telling me pride comes before a fall (I’ve never been able to take it completely at face value somehow). Perhaps it warns of the sense of self-importance that comes from showering others with charity. I shall think on this further.
I enjoyed building the picture with the cards. Each level developed the story, brought more ‘a-ha’s, prodded me in that wonderful way that Tarot does. I’ve learned something tonight.
I’m a 30-something writer, artist, tarot reader, and perpetual explorer of the space between thought, feeling, and action.
I believe that spirituality and ritual are for everybody. I’m about the journey, in all of its messy, non-linear, chaotic iterations. I am excited by anticapitalist business and living with my whole entire self present. I use tarot cards to bring forth hidden truth, and ritual to affirm my commitment, over and over, to my ever-shifting path.